Chaotic Mind

What am I doing here?
When I feel not needed at all.

What am I doing here?
When people find it easy to neglect me.

What am I doing here?
When the only thing that I can call mine, is a 2×2 desk.

What am I doing here?
When scrolling through unnecessary stuff is the only thing I do the entire day.

What am I doing here?
When the only thing I look at throughout the day is the exit door and the clock to struck 6.

Still in hope. A new beginning or a sorrow end?

Breaking Away

The mountains are calling and so are the beaches.
Uncharted territories far and beyound. A sense of getting lost is calling.

All those unknown souls I am yet to meet. A heaven full of peace and solitude is calling.

Escaping from all bondages. And unwanted connections.
My heart is calling. Yes my heart is calling.

Chaos

Here I am standing. All alone.

Plenty of people around but none whom I recognise.
Plenty of voices but no conversations that I can connect.
Is it the chaos outside or the storm inside me?

Why is there so much rush when we don’t know where we heading to.
Why have we come so far when we never wanted to leave.
Is it the noise outside or the vacuum inside me?

Why do we dream when it always shatters.
Why do we hope when we know there is no path ahead.
Is it me or the demon inside me talking?

Take Care

To the future,
Thank you for holding her hand for she is the most beautiful creation in this world.

Please ensure you keep her safe and happy, tucked away from the harsh world outside for I failed to do so.

Please ensure that you make her smile for I could only give tears.

Please ensure that you treat her right for I brought only pain.

Please ensure that you are present when she is at her lowest for I could only wish to be besides her every single moment.

Please hug her often for I could only yearn for her embrace forever.

Please compliment her for my words always failed to bring a smile.

Please always be besides her for I made the mistake of sailing away.

Please accept her the way she is for I couldn’t say she is mine.

Please let her mistakes be forgiven for she is a little child with a golden heart.

Please do not make her cry for I will inflict pain on you multiplied several times.

She is a grown up lady with a mind of her own. Respect that. Happiness for her is in the smallest of things. Remember that. She needs her space. Ensure that.

With so many years passing by, I could not get the courage to walk up to her and speak my heart out after we split. Do not make that mistake. More than her happiness, I wished to be always present when she was sad, but I failed. Do not make that mistake. When she went crazy, I went away. Do not make that mistake.

Show her always how much you want to be with her. I went mute but you do not make that mistake. Good moments aside, love is to fight together in all the struggles, in all the ups and downs. I failed but you do not make that mistake.

Keep this in mind, if I ever get a chance to show her how much I love her, I will sweep her away from her feet and carry her around the world. Take her to places where she always wanted to go. Not because she cannot go alone. But because I want to be besides her when the sun rays kiss her eyes on the mountains and the wind brushes her cheeks on the beaches. I want to be lost in her, with her forever. Never to be found again.

Maybe someday we will meet again. We will be friends once again. We will fall in LOVE all over again.

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Life isn’t measured by the number of years we live, but by the number of people’s lives we touch
And you my lady,
Yes you my BEAUTIFUL lady,
Have touched me deep, like no one has before…
Your warm breath and your soft touch,
Your pretty eyes and those lovely smiles
I can never be content and never be fulfilled

It seemed only like yesterday, we were all about each other
Never in my lifetime would that change
My body still inhales you and my soul feels
Yes you my lady
Ohh you my BEAUTIFUL lady…

Ohh you my BEAUTIFUL Lady

A Trip to Remember

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Burnt out of their daily lives Vikram and Suhani decide to take a break and make the best use of the monsoons in Mumbai. They make the journey of a 100 km outside the city limits to reach out to one of the most revered destinations in this part of the state- Matheran.

 I just had to take it. Enough was enough. Spending late nights in office finishing with the last bit of proof reading and story filling, my work for the year’s third issue of our magazine was finally over. At least the editorial work was and now it was up to others to get the copies delivered. So feeling happy that the numerous tensions that had mounted over the delay in sending out the edition were finally done with, I breathed a sigh a relief. Dragging back all the way from Bandra to my home in Ghatkopar, I opened the door lock and forced myself in, banging the door behind selflessly in the process with the last bit of energy left in me. My body needed rest and my bed was seducing me. She wasn’t wrong. For sometime now I wasn’t able to give her the time she demanded. Today was the night when we would dive into each others arms, penning a completely different world for us throughout and drawing our own dreams filled with beautiful skies and lovely streams. The water, crystal clear and the folks around, all near and dear. A world were I am with her at least till 7 in the morning before finally my cell phone alarm blaring the most ear splitting alarm noise in the world and making me jump a couple of feet’s in air and upsetting me out of my sleep.

Hum

Remembering my cell phone, I remembered that I had not called out my love, Suhani. She was on her way back to the city after an extended holiday with family. Jostling between rooms I finally managed to locate my hand phone lying lifelessly under the huge bed. It made me realize how indifferent I am towards the poor creature. Nevertheless I picked it up and straight away hit the speed dial number. The phone blinked with the name of her and a lovely smile flashed across my face. She picked it up within two rings and with the most sweetest voice said hello. I was all out then and there itself. As if, I had a couple of wings and was flying amongst the stars. But the stupid train which just passed by her seat window shoved me out of my thoughts. I asked her when is she reaching to which the reply cam that it would take her another hour or so before finally managing to step out of the compartment on the ugly Kurla terminus platform. Well those who live in Mumbai know very well why I am calling it ugly.

Tum

So after going through the usual chit chats, I asked her where are we going tomorrow, to which she said, ‘You decide’. Oh! I forgot to inform that we had already decided to take a break when she returns within which time I should be able to wrap up my magazine and what a coincidence that both of them happened on the very same day. We had decided that we would take a break but been the persons we are, we could not zero upon the place we would go. It was supposed to be monsoons in Mumbai but except for about on 5-6 days, there were no heavy rains in the last one month. Everything was dry and humid which made life more miserable. In the beginning we were dishing out places one after the other just like the street corner ice cream vendor in our childhood days who had all the flavours of the world and never failed to amaze me on how easily he could guess what I needed. So, both I and Suhani came up with the names of the most exotic, beautiful and at times stupidest places we could think of. So much so that, we even went up to the Mumbai-Goa border with never seen off places like Sindhudurg and all. But for some or the other reasons, all of them were getting stroked off from the list one after the other. So we decided to decide on some other decisive day.

But I was now here, a day before the trip and yet without a destination in mind. After scratching our heads for some more time, we both almost at the very same instant blurred out the name, Matheran and we knew we had found it. I quickly googled upon all the mediums of transport available during monsoons and the places to stay. I also knew that Suhani would always have opinions different from mine so took out the print outs of the special monsoon package tariff cards of all the resorts in Matheran. But of course I liked Usha Ascot and I knew I would be able to convince her that I have made the right choice.

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……Part 2 of the story will be uploaded soon

(This story is based completely on the writers imagination. )